Speaking of naïve romantics, I want to be honest here and say that I’ve grown somewhat cynical and grumpy about being the ‘better’ guy but not getting the girl. Just about everytime I go out I’d see simply gorgeous girls holding hands with some guy who looks like he’d just walked out of jail; or someone Drangonball-Z-esque hair; or someone whose teeth are so yellow that he’s probably been chain-smoking since he was 2.
I mean, I get it. The whole ‘nice guy’ thing doesn’t really play with the ladies these days. Apparently one needs to be much more than a caring, responsible, individual to have a shot at a relationship. He needs to be confident, cocky even, witty, and have a great sense of humor. The modern, Western, capitalist, materialist, consumptionist, society has warped the idea of attraction to the point where we have created standards for both sexes to adhere and live by. Guys are shown by ‘pickup artists’ such as David DeAngelo and the boys from “Keys to The VIP” on how to get women to be attracted to them.
Call me a hater, but I genuinely think there’s something seriously wrong when people have to take lessons and learn how to interact with women. Whatever happened to ‘learning from experience’ and ‘trial by error’? Yes, I know, there is a strong argument that goes something like “well, there are those who are just not naturally inclined to be good when dealing with getting women to like them.” Attraction is something that has existed since the dawn of civilization, longer if you want to go more primitive. People in the Roman Empire, the ancient Egyptians, the Renaissance, the Enlightenment, the 60s, all the did fine without ‘pickup artists’ (this is a terrible analogy, as there are ten thousand things wrong with it, but hopefully I got the point across).
The whole idea fo ‘attraction’ has been commercialized today. It has been turned into something that can be methodically taught, bought, and indoctrinated, and retains none of its natural intuitive gravitas.
Things never ‘just happen’ anymore. Perhaps this isn’t the fault of the people, per se, but rather that the people has been bred to become paranoid and suspicious of each other (of say, ‘strangers). Most people have been taught nowadays to be weary of strangers, and to view them with either hostility or scrutiny if they approach you. Thus, people always have their guards up when they go out, basically wearing a ‘fuck off’ sign on their foreheads so that they won’t be bothered while in public. When taking the public transit or sitting at a café, people don’t want to be bothered, don’t want to be talked to, don’t even want to be look at. Apparently everyone has some pretty serious business they have to do by themselves whilst sipping their non-fat lattes.
The café, by the way, was one of the hottest social areas during the 18th to early 20th centuries. People would go to cafes knowing that there will always be an interesting discussion taking place, and that they are always welcomed to chime in.
Anyways, the naïve romantic rant is over for now. But from where I am currently living now, I suspect I will have a lot more to say about the state of the boy & girl situation in the future.